Final Fantasy: Balance & Ruin – The Story Continues…

Terra - Chocobo Mount

I previously shared that I’m writing a novelization of fan-favorite Final Fantasy 3/6, and that the Prologue and first chapter were available as exclusive content on my BuyMeACoffee page.

How’s that for a recap, hmm?

Well, now Chapters 2 and 3 are available! These two chapters, spanning Locke and Terra’s escape from Narshe, account for approximately 7300 words, and can be all yours for a donation of a single “coffee”. That’s a steal, right? Damn right. Check it out now!

And while you’re over there, maybe you’ll consider checking out some of my other exclusive content, or maybe even subscribing to the page to become a monthly contributor! Support a starving indie, people! We’re as loyal as puppies when we’re fed. ^_~

Goals 2019: Week 12 in Review


Happy Monday everyone! Oh, what a glorious Monday it is! The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and it’s just a hip-hop-happy-happy day!

Okay, okay, pardon me for trying to start the week in a good mood!

The plain and simple truth of the matter is that this week’s report is going to be a tad embarrassing. But I’m going to grin all the way through it and refuse to take any snark (even from myself) because the fact is that week 12 was March Break, so when I wasn’t busy working I was doing my best to actually spend some time with my daughter and give her an enjoyable break.

So with that in mind, let’s take a look at just how badly I buggered up the week for myself! Yay!

Goal #1: Write half a million words.

This one has to be the most embarrassing one by far, because actually gave me a really decently easy goal for week 12. It wanted me to write 6925 words, which is one of the lowest weekly goals it’s given me since the year began. So what did I do? I totally f’ed it up, that’s what I did! Go me!

I wrote a grand total of 2134 words during week 12. Better than nothing, for sure, but I’m definitely feeling pretty sheepish about letting that easy week pass me by with such utter failure. And when I look back at previous weeks, I see that I haven’t actually killed a weekly goal since the first goddamn week of the year. This was my chance to pull it off again! But I let it pass me by, and there’s just nothing I can do about it now, so I guess there’s no use in whining. LET’S MOVE ON SHALL WE?

  • Goal #1a: Write at least a quarter million fictional words.  Okay, at least I can say this: more than half of the words I wrote last week were fictional ones. Yay! A semi-win! The only thing I really focused on in week 12 was the Final Fantasy novelization, but I really have to start getting back into more important projects as well. I need a focus boost. Someone send me some performance-enhancing mind drugs!

    (I’m kidding, for the love of god don’t send me drugs.)

Goal #2: Read at least 50 books.

Phew…so, I’m definitely behind on my Goodreads challenge now, although it’s only by a book at the moment, so I’m not in panic mode or anything. I can’t really say that I’m “failing” when it comes to this goal, so much so that I’ve been trying to read The Shining, and damn is it a dense book! Don’t get me wrong: I’m really enjoying it! It’s just got a hell-of-a-lot more to it than the movie that we’re all familiar with. It doesn’t look like that big of a book, but the pages are thin and the words are small, and it feels like it’s taking me forever to get anywhere in it. Mind you, I’ve only really had the time to read during my lunch breaks at work, so it’s not like I’m sitting down and really DIVING into it, but still… I’m only about halfway through at this point. I’m really hoping to finish it this week, not only so I can get on to something else, but because I’ve always been curious about the ending that’s apparently VERY different from the movie, and I can’t wait to actually get to it.

Goal #3: Build my social media communities…EVERYWHERE!

I’ve been trying, there’s no doubt about that, but I feel like my efforts have been a little lackluster as of late. Part of that is because I’ve been working so much, and I can’t be playing with my phone when there are customers in front of me and my boss standing only a few feet away. Part of it is that I’ve been trying to spend time with my daughter (as mentioned above), and I can’t do that with my eyes and thumbs glued to Twitter. But part of it is also a little bit of social media burn-out, I suspect. It seems like, lately, it’s been the same crap over and over again every day. The same outrage, the same dumb memes, the same companies sharing pictures of the same products… like I said, I think I’m just a little burnt out on it. I might need a bit of a reboot of some kind. I’m not really sure how to go about that, but we’ll see what happens, I guess.

Anyway, now that I’m done ranting, here are the numbers for week 12:

  • The YouTube channel gained 1 subscriber
  • The YouTube Twitter account stayed the same
  • The YouTube Instagram account went up 9 followers
  • The Snapchat account’s score went up by 3 points
  • The Author Twitter account gained 4 followers
  • The Author Instagram account went down 4 followers

It wasn’t a terrible week, all things considered. The little jump on the YouTube Instagram is nice, but I’ll withhold celebration until next week because that account seems to have weird drops soon after jumps. Everything else was pretty standard for me. Nothing too shocking there.

Goal #4: Play more (proper) video games. 

Well here’s something I can say I definitely did during week 12, in a way, anyway. Because, see, the thing is, the husband, daughter, and I played a metric ASS-TON of Mario Party during March Break. The kid has been obsessed with it, and if I’m being honest I think Jason has been a bit obsessed with it himself, and the result is that we played it basically every single night the entire week, sometimes for several hours. I generally get my ass kicked, but it’s still good fun, and we’re trying to unlock everything. It’s become a family completionist obsession, and I don’t expect it’s going to waver any time soon.

Goal #5: Put more time, focus, and energy into the YouTube channel.

Herein lies the crux of my failures. I don’t want to seem like I’m making excuses, but in my own defense, it’s been extremely difficult to find both the time and the energy. I’ve been working so much, and when I haven’t been working there have been other concerns to deal with, and when those concerns have tapered off I (and/or Jason) have been absolutely drained of any kind of fucks-to-give because life has just been too exhausting lately. I’m really hoping that with the weather starting to turn around and Spring knocking on the door we might start to feel a little better, a little more energetic, and a little more motivated. Fingers crossed. Toes crossed. All kinds of things crossed.

Okay, that wasn’t quite as painful as I was expecting. And now it’s over. I’m not going to look back at it this week. It’s over and done, and I’m moving forward into week 13. Maybe it’ll be my lucky number. You never know! >.>

How was your week? Did you accomplish any goals? Make any new ones? Do anything else that made you feel awesome and accomplished? Feel free to share in the comments!

Goals 2019: Week 11 in Review

Yep, I’m gonna say it: holy hell, did a week pass again already?!

Hey, I’m nothing if not consistent.

In all seriousness though, it was a fairly busy week, so of course it was going to go by quickly and completely screw with my brain, right? Right. You guys always agree with me because you’re the best. You know it!

Anyway, that’s enough blowing smoke up all your butts. Let’s get into the reporting, shall we?

Goal #1: Write half a million words.

Well, there’s no doubt about the fact that I did much better in week 11 than in the previous couple of weeks. I tried my very hardest to write every day, and only ended up missing out on Sunday, which I accept because we had a bit of a family game day after picking the little one up from a sleepover at her grandparent’s. Over the course of those other six days I wrote a total of 6477 words. That’s nearly a thousand words per day! Not too shabby at all, especially considering the previous few weeks. The only frustrating thing is that had set me a goal of 14,237 words for the week. So…yeah…technically I didn’t even reach half of the week’s goal. Dag nabbit, Pacemaker! Well, still, I did pretty decent, in my personal opinion. Plus, week 12’s Pacemaker goal is a lot smaller, so hopefully I’ll have a better report next week!

  • Goal #1a: Write at least a quarter million fictional words.  Another pleasant report on the sub-goal, as about two thirds of my total – to the tune of 4024 words – were fictional ones. I went a little hardcore last week on the Final Fantasy novelization. It was good times. I definitely have other things I should be working on instead, but screw it…it’s writing. I’m writing. That’s all that matters. The other things will come eventually.

Goal #2: Read at least 50 books.

First off, I’ll mention that I’ve started scribbling a note in my day planner whenever I manage to spend some time reading each day, so that I can actually keep track of how well I’m doing. That might sound ridiculous to some people, but damned if my memory isn’t a complete and utter pile of mush. Therefore, recording things. It’s important to me. Shush. Don’t judge me.

Anyway, the point is that I managed to find time to read during all my lunch hours in week 11. That doesn’t account for a huge amount of reading, because there’s also making my food and chatting with coworkers to deal with, but it’s still some reading. Currently I’m reading Stephen King’s The Shining, and it’s so good so far. I haven’t even gotten to the good stuff yet, but damn if it isn’t building a hell of an image in my head.

I think I’m actually starting to get behind on my Goodreads challenge now, but I’ll read some shorter books after this one to catch up.

Goal #3: Build my social media communities…EVERYWHERE!

Social media was the name of the game for part of the week, but got shifted to the side a little during the other part. It’s hard to concentrate on everything all the time, you know! Still, it wasn’t too bad a week, except for a couple of tiny losses.

  • The YouTube channel gained 8 subscribers
  • The YouTube Twitter account lost 1 follower
  • The YouTube Instagram account went up 3 followers
  • The Snapchat account’s score went up by 19 points
  • The Author Twitter account gained 2 followers
  • The Author Instagram account went down 1 follower

All in all, it wasn’t a terrible week, but not particularly impressive either, as you can see. The losses were minuscule, and the gains were kinda small too, but at least they’re something. I’ve been trying to get back into fun Instagram pics, but it’s a lot easier on the channel account than the book one, let me tell you!

Goal #4: Play more (proper) video games. 

Gaming this past week mostly fell to spending time with the fam, which is perfectly okay! We played some Smash Bros and Mario Party on the Switch, and I played a bit of Minecraft with the little one as well. There was also a bit of Tetris 99, but I’ve more or less given up on the idea of ever actually getting first place because DAMN. People playing that game are hardcore.

Goal #5: Put more time, focus, and energy into the YouTube channel.

Not going to mince words here: YouTube has been at the bottom of the list lately. Mind you, there’s still been a lot of thought, consideration, planning, etc, but there just hasn’t been any filming. The sad fact of the matter is that, with my current ridiculous work schedule, free time quickly becomes “just let me lay here and die” time. That might sound a little over-dramatic, but the long and short of it is that I’ve either had no time, no energy, or no inclination to film during the little bits of time I’ve had, and I’ve given up worrying about it. Filming will happen eventually, hopefully because I’ve earned a better schedule, and that’s all there really is to it. I truly hope that happens sooner rather than later, but again, I’m not going to stress myself out about it.

And that’s pretty much all there is to that. Writing is getting better, YouTube is getting worse (hopefully temporarily), and everything else is just kinda hanging out in the middle somewhere.

How was your week? Did you accomplish any goals? Make any new ones? Do anything else that made you feel awesome and accomplished? Feel free to share in the comments!

Dream Log- March 14, 2019 – Terrors on the Loose


Oooh, it’s been quite a while since I did a dream log! But I was reminded by a friend of how interesting dreams can be, and then last night I had a whopper of a stressful one that I thought was worth sharing.

I’m not sure exactly where the dream began, but the entire thing took place in an enormous mall. It was multiple levels, and had so many twists and turns in it that it was practically some kind of bizarre fun-house. It had plenty of stores and restaurants, but also unusual things like a full high school and a giant indoor zoo, which was designed in such a way that you could see it from almost any angle in the center of the building.

The first thing I remember is being in an upper level, looking down through a large window at the zoo, where some kind of show was going on. Zookeepers were in a huge enclosure with dozens of lions, tigers, and bears (oh my!), and were putting on some kind of strange play. Hundreds of people in the mall were gathered around the different viewpoints areas, watching the show. A lot of my family were there (cousins and aunts and uncles and the like), plus friends from school and random people I know.

Jason and I were watching, when we both noticed something unusual at the same time. A couple of the lions, who were supposed to have been trained to be part of this show, were slowly slinking away while their trainers were preoccupied with another part of the show. We examined the way they were going and realized that someone had left a gate slightly ajar, and that gate lead right out into the main area of the mall. We took off running, trying to alert someone, but we were pretty much as far away from that gate as we could have been and still been able to see it, so by the time we got down there animals were already escaping. It was a completely ridiculous number of animals too. Hoards of wildcats, bears, and other random vicious creatures were pouring out into the mall and attacking people. At first we tried to help people – I remember pushing a kid out of the way of a lion – and get the gate closed, but soon it was pandemonium and we just ended up running.

We ran through twists and turns, through the labyrinthine mall, with other people running and screaming around us, until we eventually found ourselves in a quiet corner that no one else seemed to have come to. It was a furniture shop, and we went right to the back where there was a large bed with a strange design; it was a bit like a bunk bed, but it only had the one actual bed, raised up a few feet, so that there was a nook underneath with blankets spread out on the floor. We climbed into this nook and had a lay down on the blankets. I remember that, despite what had just happened, we weren’t particularly scared. It was like we knew there was a disaster happening, but we were 100% confident that we two were going to be absolutely fine. The only little blip of worry I had was when I remembered that Adrianna had been in the mall with her great-aunt Nancy, and I started texting, asking if they were okay, but I was very confident that they were fine as well.

Eventually a worker and a customer appeared in the store, seemingly completely unaware of the animal attacks. Jason and I watched from under the bed as they roamed around, looking at different things, until they finally came to the bed we were under and we wiggled out and took off, giggling like schoolkids who’d been caught making out.

There were definite signs of the animal attacks as we roamed back through the mall – dead bodies and blood, for a start – but the emergency itself seemed to be over and everyone was just going about their mall business as though nothing had happened. Jason and I ended up finding the rest of our family hanging out on the top level of the mall, outside a large ice cream shop. We were asked to join them, and a waiter came out to take our orders.

I remember being very confused by this shop because, as near as I could see, almost none of the items on the menu were actually ice cream. There were weird pastries and mugs of things that looked like oatmeal, and strange “desserts” that basically just looked like bowls of some kind of cream. The only actual ice cream I could find was a banana split kind of thing that had chunks of waffle-cone instead of the banana. Jason and my father both ordered one of those, but I ordered some weird pastry thing. When everyone started getting their orders, they were even weirder than the menu implied. My mom’s was a bowl of powder that she had to add hot water to herself. Mine was basically a golf-ball-sized donut-hole-looking thing with cream inside. Only Jason’s and dad’s splits looked good, and they were digging into them so I assume they were good.

I’m not sure exactly what kicked off the second disaster, but I remember running in a crowd of people. None of my family was with me, but I kept noticing people I knew in the crowd as we ran. Old friends from school, new coworkers, etc. As we ran through the maze that was this weird mall, things started getting psychedelic and very, very creepy. The power went out, but there were still strange lights coming from here and there, flashing and making the atmosphere of the place feel like a haunted house. There was screaming and wailing and lots of weird shapes and colors that made me feel like I was on some kind of acid trip or something. I remember seeing my friend Krystle and her boyfriend, running but calling back to me with their hands out like it was imperative that I get to them. Then it got darker and more shadowy, with the occasional flash like lightning, but for the most part I felt like I was running in complete darkness. And as I ran, people around me began to disappear into the darkness, until there were only a few of us left.

The couple of strangers and I eventually found ourselves in something that looked like a daycare center, but in the middle of the room, facing each other in a circle, were four rectangular-shaped splits in reality that looked like portraits of other galaxies. Somehow or other we came to the conclusion that going through one of these portals was our only way to escape the present disaster, so we chose one, and one of the strangers went through. I followed without hesitation, and we found ourselves…

…in, like…a cartoon world. It was bright and colorful and bubbly, and the characters were super-happy to meet us. It was really, really odd, but within the dream I remember thinking that we couldn’t have picked a better portal, because surely nothing bad would happen here.

Any thoughts? Ideas? Concerns? Feel free to share in the comment section below, and also feel free to tell me what you think of dreams in general, what you think their purpose might be, and fell free to share some of your own! Cheers!

AWESOME Mezco Toy Fair 2019 Exclusives Unboxing! One:12 Blade & Agent Gomez Action Figures & More!

New York Toy Fair is a pretty big deal in the collector community, and something Jason and I would love to be able to visit for ourselves some day. Unfortunately, at least for the time being, it’s just not in the cards. But this year we got a little bit of Toy Fair in the mail to cheer us up, and BOY, did it cheer us up!

Mezco Toyz, one of our favorite toy companies, sent us one of their amazing Toy Fair goodie bags, and it was PACKED with amazing items that we’ve absolutely fallen in love with. You honestly have to see it to believe it, so go see it! Go see it now!