2022: The Year of Trying Desperately to Keep It Together (Week 14)

Okay, first and foremost: someone remind me what day of the week it is? And what the date is? And possibly what month it is? No, because, seriously, this past week has been one of those weeks that really screws up my brain and leaves me wondering what has happened and whether or not I’ve time traveled, and I’m having a really difficult time shaking myself back to reality.

Okay, okay, okay, in all seriousness, I know that it’s Wednesday because my daughter’s school schedule reminds me that the days of the week exist. And I know that it’s April 20th because my husband pointed out that it’s 4-20 day today. But honestly, if not for those things, I’d probably be absolutely lost.

The main reason that my head is so scrambled is because we spent the weekend down home amongst family for the holiday. We left for the drive on early Saturday morning, attended my cousin’s kid’s birthday party, and spent the night drinking and watching hockey with my inlaws. Then, the next day, we had Easter dinner with my parents, the kid and I played several rounds of Yahtzee with my mom and aunt, and then we went back to the inlaws for more hockey (and fewer drinks because we were all too tired and not really feeling the booze). Then the NEXT day we went shopping with the mother-in-law because she wanted the kid to pick out a present for Easter, the kid did in fact pick out some cool stuff, we swung around to the local FedEx center to pick up my new laptop, we visited hubby’s grandmother so that she could drown us in baked goods, we ran back over to my parents’ for leftovers supper, and we drove home to watch The Batman.

*deep breath*

In other words, it was a family-filled weekend, complete with boring drives and two nights of sleeping on an air mattress, which always does an amazing job of making me feel like I could sleep for at least a week and a half.

By the time we got home Monday night it was pretty late, but we’d already promised the kid that we would watch The Batman, so we did, and then yesterday I was trying desperately to catch up on things, but my brain just refused to function. I’m not exactly in much better of a state today, but I’ve managed to pluck up enough wherewithal to force through a few things, so here we are getting this post out of the way before it becomes too late to even bother with it. :3

One more thing to talk about before I get into the goals: I am adoring my new laptop so far. It has a bigger screen than my Chromebook had, but isn’t all that much bigger overall, so it’ll still be easy to travel with. The keyboard will take a little bit of getting used to simply because the layout is a little different, but the keys are quite responsive and not loud (which is very nice for a writer). The mouse screen also becomes a calculator, which might seem like a silly thing but is something that I genuinely appreciate for when I’m calculating word counts and the like. So far it seems to run perfectly well for my purposes, and I will finally be able to use Scrivener again, which was one of the big selling points of switching back to a Windows-based computer instead of another Chromebook. I haven’t had a chance to actually start writing with Scrivener yet (there’s been a major update since the last time I used it, so there may be a few new things to learn), but that’s where I’m headed as soon as this post is out of the way. My only annoyance is that I thought this model had an SD card slot, but it apparently doesn’t. That’s frustrating, but the laptop has three times the storage as my Chromebook had, so I doubt I’ll have much issue. I’ll just have to keep any external shows or movies or what-have-you that I want to travel with on a USB drive instead.

Okay, so now that I’ve gushed a little about my new toy, let’s move on into the main part of the post, shall we?


Goal Set #1: Creative Fulfilment

Okay! So, when I started talking about how busy the weekend was you probably assumed that I had very little time or energy to write, yes? Well, you wouldn’t be horribly off the mark there, but luckily my Pacemaker.press goal for the week was rather lenient, so I still actually managed to hit it in the end. Pacemaker wanted me to come up with 7975 words, and I managed to squirm a few hundred words past that with a final weekly total of 8401 words. I do have to admit, however, that precisely none of those words went toward The Other World Book Three. Last week I was very focused on You Can Stay At My Place for the simple reason that I’d caught up to what was written in advance and needed to get a new chapter finished to post for my Patrons. :3

That said, I did also start a spicy short fic that was kinda meant for Easter, but didn’t end up getting posted on time because I didn’t manage to finish it. I’ll whip up the rest of it sometime this week and post it late anyway because honestly, it’s more about the spiciness than the holiday anyway. 😛

On the artistic side of things, I worked on two pieces this past week and ended up quite happy with the one that I finished. I’m not sharing the full thing here yet because it is currently a treat for my Patrons, but it is going to be one of the illustrations for the eventual In Silence Our Secrets Lie ebook, and I’ll give you the two thumbnails that I shared on Instagram and Twitter:

Aren’t my bois pretty? Hells yeah, they are!

Anyway, those two thumbnails are from the same overall picture, which features Aziraphale giving Crowley some much-needed medical care, a la Chapter 2 of ISOSL.

The other piece that I worked on – but which isn’t finished yet – is the one that I shared a little sketchy thumbnail of last week. It’s a collared-Crowley piece, which I’ve begun the line-art of, and I’m pretty pleased with it so far. Here’s an updated thumbnail for you:

I know that he has something of a worried look on his face, but don’t worry…he’s thoroughly enjoying himself. :3


Goal Set #2: Physical Focus

UGH. Do I have to talk about this section? *sigh*

Okay, so, I mean…I’m trying, I really am. There were days last week when I did exercise vids, other days when I went for long walks, and several days during which the hubby, kid, and I went out after school to shoot some hoops over at the local playground. That said, I’m not going to lie about the results, of which there haven’t been any worth discussing. I’d like to be able to say that the exercise revitalizes me, makes me feel strong and accomplished and eager for more. I’d love to be able to say that, in fact. But it would be a pale-faced lie, because when it really comes down to it I’ve just felt even more tired than usual.

Maybe I need to drink more water (although, honestly, I’m not sure I can realistically consume anymore than I already have been). Maybe I need some more bloody sun (which has been in short supply recently, because Spring in Nova Scotia equates to twice as many clouds as Winter, and a truly disgusting amount of rain). Maybe (definitely) I need to stay away from the sweets and empty carbs.

But long story short, I’ve been feeling so goddamn tired. Even sitting here, writing this, after having two large glasses of water and a coffee, I feel like I could easily curl up on my site and pass out. In fact, I did precisely that last night after supper. And then easily fell asleep again at a normal time that night. It’s like my body wants to spent at least half of its time asleep lately, and I hate it.


Goal Set #3: Self-Promotion/Branding

I’ll be honest and blunt: I don’t even really remember what (if anything) I did toward this goal last week. I have a vague recollection of posting some TikToks, maybe engaging with some people on Twitter, but that’s about it.

All I can really tell you is that I didn’t have any losses last week. I had a few minor gains (the TikTok followers are increasing again!), and anything that didn’t gain stayed steady where it had been. And you know what? I can handle that. Gains are nice, but in my mind a lack of losses is just as good.

Other than that, I can mention that I haven’t had any book sales or pages read in a while, which is definitely a bummer. I did, however, sign up for something called a ‘Book Review Flash Mob’ that is happening over on TikTok, so fingers crossed that one of my books gets chosen for that somewhere along the line. :O


Goal Set #4: Mental Well-Being

And then there was this nonsense! Okay, okay, it’s not nonsense, but do you realize how easy it is for someone with mental health problems to make fun of their own problems? It’s, like…almost a requirement, if I’m being honest.

My mental well-being was tested this past weekend, for a number of reasons, none of which are important to you. So anyway

First up on the docket is reading, which I can get through pretty easily because I haven’t been doing a great deal of it. Mostly I’ve been reading short, one-shot fanfiction recently, just went I have a few spare moments between chores and the like. The only other thing that I ‘read’ last week was a little bit of The Book of Dust: La Belle Sauvage, which I’m still listening to on Audible. It’s getting better and i desperately want to know what happens next, but I haven’t been able to keep my mind on such things recently. Once I head back out West for another run I’m sure I’ll have much better luck.

Secondly let’s go with games, for which the report is very similar to the reading one. I’ve picked up Borderlands 2 a few more times, and I’ve run through a stage or two of Cup Head with the kid, but I definitely haven’t done much major in the gaming category. There just hasn’t been much time, nor desire, if I’m being truly honest.

Watching stuff, on the other hand…our third category has a lot more going for it. Honestly, I’m probably going to forget a dozen things, so bear with me.

The big thing is that we watched The Batman, which was quite excellent, in my opinion. It is very, very different from any other Batman movie that you may have seen, but that’s part of why it’s great. It’s nice to see Batman do some detective work rather than just the fist-throwing side of things, and The Joker was a surprisingly well-done and fairly creepy villain for the whole thing. I also thought Pattinson did a pretty great job as the caped crusader, although I will say that his version of Bruce Wayne was a little bit too reclusive and emo for my tastes.

Sticking with movies, we finished watching all of the Scream movies with the kid, who enjoyed them quite well (with the possible exception of the third one, which she slept through at least half of). I’ll admit that it was a little bit amusing when she noticed Courtney Cox on the screen at my parents’ house (they were watching Friends) and said, “Hey, is that Gail?” XD

Hubby and I have also been re-watching a few shows, such as JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure and One Punch Man, just because. Sometimes stuff you’ve already enjoyed is what’s necessary.

I feel like there was definitely more that we watched since my last post, but fak if I can remember, so for now I guess we’ll just stop here.


So it was a busy week of various nonsense, during which I managed to get a little bit of stuff worked on, while simultaneously managing not to fuck anything up too badly. I think I can take that as a win!


Feel free to let me know how your year is going so far! Do you have any big goals? Specific plans? Anything awesome on the horizon? Share what’s going on with you! 

Support a Content Creator Today!

If you’re reading this post, you likely came here from An Archive of Our Own after reading one of my fan-fiction posts, so firstly I would like to say thank you very much for reading, and welcome to my blog!

I’ve asked you to come here because, as much as we all love AO3, there are certain rules on the site which prohibit content creators from sharing information relating to their other accounts and projects if those sites may be of a monetary nature. I’ve been assured, however, that linking to a blog post, which then shares other links to you lovely people, is perfectly fine, so thank you again for dropping by! In this post I want to share a number of ways – both totally free and monetarily-linked – that you can support me as one of your favorite content creators!


Firstly, if you did in fact come here from my AO3 account, you may be interested in the fact that I post new chapters of my stories a week in advance on my Patreon account. Anything new goes there first and spends at least a week in Early-Access. It is also where I post my artwork – both SFW and NSFW – as I’m creating it, and I also occasionally post polls, requests for ideas, and so forth. If you’re interested in being one of the first people to see everything I create, please take a look and see if any of my plan options are right for you!

Secondly – and concurrently – I am more than happy to take art commission requests. I mainly do line art with a small splash of color (think irises, tattoos, or a specific clothing item), and charge $10 for the first character, an additional $5 per extra character, but more complicated pieces can be discussed for a fair price. If you have an idea for something you would like to commission from me, please feel free to contact me here, through my Patreon page, or on any of my social media (shown below).

Thirdly, if you are a fan of my writing, you might be interested in knowing that I also have published original books! they can be found on Amazon (paperback) and Kindle (ebook), and I’m pleased to say that they have some quite lovely reviews. 🙂 If you are interested in checking them out, click on these links to take a look at Nowhere to Hide (a YA zombie apocalypse horror story), and The Other World: Book One and Book Two (a YA fantasy adventure series).

Finally, if you’re more the ‘sharing is caring’ type, please feel free to check out my author-based social media accounts on Twitter and Instagram, as well as my ‘anything goes’ TikTok account. Following my accounts, liking and sharing posts, and commenting on your favorite comments is an awesome way to show me that you’re enjoying what I do while also bringing new viewers/readers to my content, and any little bit is extremely appreciated!


With all that said, thank you very much once again for reading this post, and whether you decide to further support me or not I hope you have an awesome day and continue to enjoy my free content! Cheers, my lovelies!

2022: The Year of Trying Desperately to Keep It Together (Week 5)

A day late, a dollar short, and a few thoughts and opinions heavier!

Which is to say that I have a couple of things to chat about before I get into the goals this week.

Firstly, I have something of a public service announcement, and it basically goes thus: if someone in your life believes that they suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder (aka Seasonal Fatigue or Seasonal Depression), I respectfully request that you give that person a massive hug right now and ask them if they’d like a hot drink or something. No, seriously. I suffer from S.A.D. (yes I know the acronym is fucking stupid) every winter, despite efforts to combat it with supplements and rest and exercise and so forth, and it fucking sucks. I feel like I’ve been tired for months now, and it only seems to be getting worse as the winter drags on. It doesn’t matter how much sleep I get, or whether I’m super-active or super-lazy, I always feel like I could lay my head and pass out in moments. In fact, I’ve done so several times in the past week at totally random times of day. No joke, one day I took, like…a three hour nap. And that was sandwiched around two normal nights of roughly 7-8 hours of sleep. And I still felt tired.

Seriously, fuck the human body and all it’s ridiculous flaws.

Okay, now, with that said…

I’ll be mentioning my squirrel TikTok vid again later in the post, but I just wanted to take this moment to remind all of the wonderful content creators out there on the internet that there are always going to be pricks who want nothing more than to knock you down, and those pricks always seem to be the loudest voices in the crowd. BUT. You choose whether to listen to them or not. If you love what you do, if you’re having fun and/or making a living and/or learning new things, keep your head up and keep going. Put in your metaphorical earplugs and press on. The best way to piss off those people who want to break you is by not letting them. Live your life for you, and let the sad, pathetic pricks of the world stew in the knowledge that you are better than them.

Okay, I’ve got that out of my system, so let’s move along, shall we?


Goal Set #1: Artistic Fulfilment

Let’s go with writing first this week.

I think I’ve been going through a bit of writer’s block recently, because it seems like every time I sit down in front of my Chromebook my brain just goes blank. Each sentence has been a struggle, and it’s definitely not because I don’t want to write. My muse is just, like…on vacation or something. That said, there are a few good things to note from last week.

Firstly, since my Pacemaker.press goal for last week was fairly low, I actually managed to surpass it for the first time so far this year. I was set a goal of 8126 words and I ended the week with 9055, so go me!

Secondly, though I didn’t really get anything done toward ‘The Other World: Book Three’, I did complete ‘The Prince’s Consort’, so that is another novel-length fic done and dusted. Does that mean that I’m going to take a break from writing fanfiction? Oh goodness gracious no. Ha ha ha ha ha…but it does give me a much needed dopamine boost for having finished something completely. Too bad the dopamine doesn’t wake me the fuck up, but hey…little victories.

Moving on to art, I managed to actually create something for the third week in a row, so there’s some lethargic dance-wiggles going on for that. Firstly, as I’m pretty certain at this point that I’m not going to try mucking with the colors any further, here’s the cover art that I made for ‘In Silence Our Secrets Lie’ in full:

I’m pretty pleased with it. ^_^ I just need to add the title font and it will be all set for the eventual ebook version of the fic.

Then I had a bit of a sudden desire to draw a scene from the second chapter of the book. I couldn’t resist, and soon I had it complete. It’s currently an early-access pic on my Patreon, but I’ll give you guys a little sneak peak:

Poor Crowley in the beginning of that fic…but don’t worry, things get better for him pretty quickly.

Finally, I recently wrote a short fic for Valentine’s Day, which is currently in early-access on my Patreon as well until the actual holiday. Shortly after posting it there, I had an urge to draw a scene from that one as well. So far I’ve only done the rough sketch, but I hope to flesh out the line art in the next day or two. In the meantime, here’s a sneak peak:

I’m very pleased with this rough, so I really hope the line art turns out as nice. ❤

In other artistic news, I’ve been alternately picking at one of the pages in the ‘Jason Mamoa Crush’ coloring book I got for Christmas. It’s extremely silly, but quite fun. For the future though, I would like to get a nicer set of markers. The set I have right now is nice, but it only has twelve colors, so the options get pulled pretty thin.


Goal Set #2: Physical Focus

You may have already guessed by my mentioning of S.A.D. issues that I haven’t been feeling particularly active this past week. I did do a few of the 645 program videos throughout the week, but I’ve been spreading them out quite a bit more than they’re meant to be spread, and I’ve been trying to keep on my feet in order to get more steps throughout the day, but I only managed to hit 10k once, soooo…yeah.

On the other hand, I’ve been doing a half-decent job of keeping my mouth and stomach in check, so there is that. I’ve been trying not to pay too much attention to my weight though, because I know I’m not going to lose anything without a deficit, and it’s practically impossible for me to manage a deficit without a proper calorie burn.

GAH. Body image nonsense. Moving on…

On a note that’s related to this foolishness, I’ve been trying to get used to taking the time and putting in the energy to actually make myself up in the mornings. Hair moderately done, make-up on, and all that. Sometimes it feels like a waste, and some days (like today) I just can’t find the fucks to give, but sometimes it’s the little push of confidence that I need to actually get some stuff done throughout the day. There’s just something about looking nice that makes you feel good and want to get stuff done.

Plus I refuse to do any TikToks when I don’t look good. 😛


Goal Set #3: Self-Promotion/Branding

Okay, so, first off, you might recall that last week I made a big deal about reaching 440 followers on TikTok. And it was a big deal. But as it turns out, the numbers were not nearly finished rising. As of this posting my follower count has hit 2209. o.o This is pretty much entirely thanks to that admittedly silly squirrel video which has hit more than 600,000 views at this point, shocking me absolutely silly.

It is at this point that I have to admit that I haven’t really been doing much at all to capatilize on this sudden influx of eyes on my account. I’ve done a few updates on ‘Timmie’ the squirrel, and a few other random little silly videos, but nothing major. I was thinking about taking part in an author challenge that is currently going on for the month of February, but as previously mentioned I had a bit of a ‘no fucks to give’ day today, so it hasn’t happened yet.

Looking at other social media, book sales (or lack thereof), and so on, uh…actually, you know what? Best not to mention those at all. *cough cough*


Goal Set #4: Mental Wellbeing

Mentally and emotionally speaking, things have been…average? Once again I bring you back to the seasonal bullshit that has me sleeping stupid hours and feeling like a big old stack of crap. But I’ve also been giving myself permission to relax as much as I can.

Games have been totally out, but only because I haven’t really felt like indulging in anything like that.

Other things however…

For one, I’ve been enjoying watching as much of the Olympics as I can manage (considering it’s happening a full 12 hours off from us), and we’ve watched several shows and movies recently. We watched both ‘Shang Chi’ and ‘The Eternals’ in the past few days, so that was fun. Neither were the kinds of movies that I’ll probably ever watch again, but they were enjoyable enough in the moments. Jason and I have also started watching the most recent season of ‘What We Do in the Shadows’, which is always a silly good time.

Also, not gonna lie, I may have watched ‘Encanto’ again the other day, and am actually in the process of watching it again as I write this post, because I’m a little bit obsessed with it. *COUGH*

Then there’s reading time, which – believe it or not – has been spread out over several different types of options. Yes I have been reading fanfiction because THE AMAZING OPTIONS NEVER END, but I also listened to a few more hours worth of ‘The Sandman Act 2’ on Audible, and read my physical copy of ‘Kingdom of the Wicked’. That last I just finished today, and I have two major thoughts on it. The first is that it was amazing and I loved it. The second is that it ended on something of a cliffhanger which I hate with every fiber of my being. I was tempted to immediately order a copy of the second book, ‘Kingdom of the Cursed’, but the third book isn’t out until September, so I’m not really in that much of a rush to find myself at another cliffhanger with no way to deal with it for several months. So I will simply say, RAWR. RAWWWWRRRR.


So that was pretty much that; a week of art and mildly difficult writing, and a ton of self-care in an attempt to get myself through the rest of the winter. I can’t really complain about the results of the week, but I can’t hype it up too much either. Instead, I’m going to go finish watching ‘Encanto’ for the third time and hope that I feel a little less fatigued by tomorrow. Wish me luck!

Feel free to let me know how your year is going so far! Do you have any big goals? Specific plans? Anything awesome on the horizon? Share what’s going on with you! ❤

2022: The Year of Trying Desperately to Keep It Together (Week 4)

Okay…okay…okay…

YOU GUYS.

Before I get into anything else today, I need to tell you guys about the TikTok I posted yesterday. No, no, seriously, even if you’re not into TikTok, please just…give me a minute.

Okay, so, I haven’t been on TikTok for very long, and I don’t, like…put a huge amount of effort into it or anything; I’m basically just playing around and having a laugh. So as of yesterday morning I had about 150 followers, and my best performing video had approximately 1700 views, which I thought was pretty decent, honestly.

Then, I made a discover in the shed in our backyard… And I thought it was amazingly adorable and hysterical, so I filmed myself showing what I’d found and posted it here. If you have no desire to watch the video or don’t want to download TikTok just to see it, highlight the rest of this paragraph (which I’ve made white to make it invisible) to know what the vid is about: There’s a squirrel living in our shed, and apparently he’s been collecting Tim Horton’s Timbits for AGES because he’s got a metric ass-ton of them gathered in there. XD

So anyway, I post this video, expecting that people will probably get a kick out of it, but not really holding my breath for anything major…

And you guys…as of the moment that I’m writing this, the video has 47.8k views, 6281 likes, and over 400 comments (after subtracting my responses). Not to mention I’m now up over 300 followers, which still isn’t a lot, but it’s double what it was yesterday, sooooo…damn.

DUDES…I am flabbergasted like you wouldn’t believe. That little squirrel and his donut hole hoard is now my best friend. XD

And now that I”m still riding that high, let’s go ahead and look at some goal stuff, shall we?


Goal Set #1: Artistic Fulfilment

Okay, first off, I’m not going to lie…’artistic fulfilment’ was a bit more like ‘agonized desperation to create’ this week. Basically, I wanted to create, and I might even say that I needed to create, but it was as if my brain and body weren’t in sync and things were just refusing to compute in a way that would result in the creation of things. In other words: BLARRRGGGGGG.

Let’s look at art first, because there’s not much to report, but I did attempt to color the drawing that I teased last week, so here’s roughly the same chunk of the drawing, but with the color added:

I’ll admit that when I’d first finished the base layers I wasn’t overly impressed and decided to walk away for a while to give myself some time to breathe away from it. Then, just opening it now so that I could crop this bit off, I’m surprised to say that I’m actually kinda liking it now. I think I should probably still try some shading, but I’m tempted to just say ‘screw it’ and make this the finished thing. I’ll keep away from it for a little while longer though, because I’ve got other stuff to focus on in the meantime.

On the writing side of things, I’m just gonna go ahead and admit that I spent the majority of the week obsessing over one chapter of ‘The Prince’s Consort’, and it wasn’t even what should have been a difficult chapter. It was literally just soft, lovely, romantic fluff, but my brain would not process it. It took me basically the entire week to write that one chapter, and my head was aching by the end of it. I don’t know if that’s a sign that I am well and truly done with the story, or if I’ve just got a raging case of pandemic brain, or what… But anyway, the result of that week of literary agony is that I only managed to write a total of 7698 words over the course of the week. That’s not great considering Pacemaker.press wanted me to write 12,803 words, but I’m giving myself a bit of a pass since the words refused to flow.

In other artistic-type news, I finished my first gem painting! It’s…not the best picture, because it’s a fairly small one made from a portrait with far too many details (a Star Wars poster), but it still looks pretty neat nonetheless, and I thoroughly enjoyed the process. I definitely want to do more of them, but next time I’ll probably find something bigger so that there are more gems, and thus clearer detail.


Goal Set #2: Physical Focus

On the health and fitness side of the world, I took a somewhat slow-and-steady approach to things last week. Rather than leap head-first into a dozen different things like I normally do, I did my best to relax and congratulate myself for small victories throughout the day. For instance: drinking lots of water, avoiding excess sugar, skipping dessert when I genuinely wasn’t hungry, and so forth. There were no measurable results, but I was working on just the concept of feeling good for those little accomplishments.

Having survived that, I made a plan for this current week, which basically boils down to “get your ass moving and do some exercise, one way or the other”. That could just mean walking in circles around the house until I hit my 10k steps for the day, or traditional exercise, whichever I’m feeling that day. I did start the 645 program on Beachbody today, and I did enjoy it, so I’m going to try to do that for a while, but I’m refusing to mentally commit to it, because that way lies giving up and feeling like a failure.


Goal Set #3: Self-Promotion/Branding

You guys, I don’t even know what to say about this one for last week…lol

I mean…by the time I’m getting to this part of the post (I got distracted for a bit when our fridge stopped working…yikes!) I’ve hit 440 followers on TikTok, which is a direct result of the MORE THAN 60k hits my vid from yesterday has gotten. That’s…that’s quite a thing right there. It’s also mostly pure luck, so I don’t know if I can necessarily count it under the umbrella of ‘self-promotion and branding’.

But you know what? I’ll take it. XD

All the other social stuff is basically the same as last week, and I haven’t sold any books or anything, so I can’t really claim that I successfully promoted myself or branded myself. The successes of the week really come down to pure, unadulterated luck, and that’s really all there is to it!


Goal Set #4: Mental Wellbeing

This one was a bit of a rollercoaster throughout the week, and more than anything that’s simply because the world is a weird fucking place right now, and sometimes my brain refuses to process that in a healthy way. This could easily be why I was having such a difficult time writing last week, but I digress.

I did my best to keep my mental wellbeing in mind throughout the week, and sometimes I succeeded, while other times I just plain didn’t. In both cases, I did survive, so I suppose that’s really all that matters in the end.

When it comes to reading, I mostly just picked at a bit of fan-fiction here and there. When it comes to games, I played and completed ‘Oxenfree’, including getting all of the trophies (it’s a cute, short game…I rather enjoyed it). When it comes to consumable visual media, hubby and I finished ‘Hellbound’ (which broke my brain a little bit), and started watching the final season of ‘Brooklyn 99’ (which never fails to crack me the hell up). We also watched the fourth ‘Matrix’ movie, which…I mean, it had a few entertaining scenes, but mostly it felt like a poorly-written shameless cash grab. But that’s just me.


So that was the week, and if it feels like my narrative kinda slipped and got lazy as the post went on, well…yeah, it definitely did. Not gonna lie, I had a bit of an exhausting day – both mentally and physically – and I’m only just finishing this post after having started it nearly ten hours ago. Don’t worry, nothing major happened or anything, I’m just genuinely beat in more ways than one. So, if you don’t mind I’m going to wander out into the kitchen now and put together a yummy snack that we can have during the hockey game that starts in about an hour and a half, and then I’m gonna crash like a bus driven by a dog. Cheers!

Feel free to let me know how your year is going so far! Do you have any big goals? Specific plans? Anything awesome on the horizon? Share what’s going on with you! ❤

2022: The Year of Trying Desperately to Keep It Together (Week 3)

It’s totally Tuesday, isn’t it? Yeah, it’s 100% Tuesday. So…the first year of the month is going well and is totally being kept organized and efficient. >.>

Sue me, my brain hasn’t been working correctly lately. lol

So, normally I would talk about a few random things that happened throughout the week before I get into the goal stuff, but this week the few things that I was going to mention actually fall in well with the goal stuff, so I’m going to just go ahead and roll into it. I’m sure you’re alright with that? Okay, good.


Goal Set #1: Artistic Fulfilment

I can honestly say that I’m 95% pleased with the way artistic fulfilment went this past week. Starting off with something simple and a bit silly, I am now roughly 4/5ths of the way done with my gem painting project. I don’t know if I’d necessarily file that one under ‘artistic fulfilment’, since it doesn’t boil down to much more than ‘paint by numbers’ with one dot of color at a time, but I don’t care, I’m counting it. It’s art in the broad sense, it’s fun, it helps me turn my brain off for a while, and you end up getting something cool to hang on your wall out of it. I am definitely going to be getting more of them, without a doubt.

Moving on to something more, well…more, we have the writing, for which I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that I once again did not hit my weekly word count. The good news is that I’m getting closer and closer to it, so surely I’ll manage to hit it soon! Pacemaker.press wanted me to write 9348 words for last week, and I wound up finishing off the week with 8971 words. And, if I”m being quite honest, it likely would have been a lot more if it hadn’t been for the fact that I got my Covid booster shot on Thursday and my body didn’t like it. Whether it was because I was a bit dehydrated, or already hadn’t been getting quite enough sleep, or whether my system just doesn’t enjoy vaccines or whatever, the booster shot hit me like a ton of bricks. I got it Thursday afternoon, and by late that evening I was laying in bed, watching ‘Encanto’ and debating whether it was worth the gargantuan quantities of energy it would take to drag myself up vertical and go to the bathroom. Seriously, I was exhausted beyond the telling of it, and my whole body was sore as though I’d had the crap kicked out of me in an MMA fight. I spent damn near an entire 24 hours just laying down, watching things and reading until I passed out. It actually may have been a good time to get a bit of writing done, if my brain had been functioning in the slightest.

All that said, just under 9k words is nothing to sneeze at. And, even better, most of those words went toward ‘The Other World: Book Three’! No, really! I got three whole chapters written for it! I swear! XD

Lastly, on the artistic front, I not only finished the piece that I mentioned last week, but I also began and made wide strides toward the completion of another!

Firstly, the piece I mentioned last week. It is a gift for a fellow fanfic writer who goes by ‘Verdant Vulpus’. Their ‘The Trouble With Being a Demon’ series is one of my favorites, and not the least of the reasons is because having Book!Crowley and TV!Crowley together in the same story is just wonderfully fun and fantastic. So, bearing that in mind, I drew Vulpus the two demons hanging out, trying to look cool and suave for their angels:

I’m quite pleased with the way it turned out! I considered attempting to color it, but I’m just sooooo bad with color, and I didn’t want to ruin my satisfaction with it. 😛

Now, generally when I manage to pull off something half-decent like this, my desire to ART hibernates for a little while…but not in this case. Pulling the demon boys together inspired me to do something I’d been thinking about doing for ages. That is, taking some of my long fics and compiling them into downloadable ebook files, complete with cover art drawn by myself. :O

I decided to start with the one that really started it all, as far as the novel-length fics go: ‘In Silence Our Secrets Lie’. I’d had an image in my head for forever for how I wanted the cover to look, and so I finally put stylus to tablet and sketched something out. The next thing I knew I was also doing the line-art, and then I was sharing it to my Patreon! This one I will be coloring – or at least, attempting to – since it’s for a ‘book’ cover’, therefore I’m only going to share a small clip of it here for now.

What do you think? ^_^ I chose this part to share because I’m especially pleased with Crowley’s face, which is supposed to look very tired and kinda destroyed, but also a bit relieved because he’s just been rescued (don’t worry, that’s not a spoiler…it happens in the first chapter). It came out precisely the way I wanted it, and I especially like Aziraphale’s wing wrapping around his back. I’m honestly grinning like an idiot just looking at it. I really hope that I don’t fuck it up trying to color it. :O


Goal Set #2: Physical Focus

In terms of physical health and the like, I must first bring your attention back to my booster shot and the fact that it caused me to basically lose a day and a half of the week. Do I regret getting the booster? Absolutely not. I am 100% pro-vaccination. I’m just stating facts: the shot hit me like a truck full of bricks straight to the face, so I spent the second half of Thursday and the entirety of Friday pretty much sedentary. So, that was one issue.

Well, that was the only issue, really…unless you count the fact that it’s been uncomfortably cold this past week, so I’ve been spending a lot of time snuggled up under a couch blanket, trying to keep warm. Which is a nice way of saying that I haven’t been doing what one might call exercise. Like, at all. I did do one of Sharona Hill’s dancing vids, but that was it because – let’s be blunt about it – I was just to bloody lazy. And sooky. And contrary.

Lord I hate Winter. Why do New Year’s resolutions and the like have to take place in the middle of Winter? I’d do so much better if these kinds of things happened in mid-Spring.

ANYWAY.

The consumption side of things has been a bit more to the positive side of things. It’s difficult not to shove every available morsel down my throat in Winter, but I’m beginning to relearn how to restrain myself when I’m not genuinely hungry, and to make better choices when I am. Hard habits to break, but it’s getting better…I chose yogurt over a chocolate-covered granola bar the other day. 😛


Goal Set #3: Self-Promotion/Branding

Well, I will say this: I did get a little taste last week of what can happen when you actually show off your books… I did a joke-y TikTok about my three published novels, shared it to Twitter as well, and immediately someone who had stumbled across the post went and bought all three. To say that I was pleasantly surprised would definitely be an understatement.

So I obviously turned around and repeated the results, right? Well…uh, no. No I didn’t. I, uh…I didn’t even try. No excuse for that, really. But obviously I should at least attempt to do so. *cough cough*

As far as other things go, most of the social media accounts have been pretty stagnant of late, which isn’t a huge surprise since I haven’t been posting much to them. And the YouTube channels have been even more stagnant, mostly because the basement is bloody freezing right now and neither my husband nor I want to be done there. It’s just not enjoyable. We’re going to have to at some point, but for now we’re being stubborn because COLD. Goddamn cold!


Goal Set #4: Mental Wellbeing

For the most part I’m calling this section a win for last week. There were a couple of rough days – one of them being the day that I spent feeling like I’d been beaten up – but overall it was pretty decent.

I spent a fair bit of time last week reading, although I have to admit that it was entirely fan-fiction. No regrets though; it was all excellent fan-fiction.

I also spent a fair bit of time watching movies and shows, particularly while I was doing a great impression of an invalid. I finally watched Encanto, which I absolutely adored, followed by the entire last season of Final Space, which is a strange animated show that can’t decide if it wants to be funny or heartbreaking. Hubby and I watched the third season of Cobra Kai, finished off F is for Family, and have gotten about halfway through Hellbound, which is a strange Korean horror-show that I can’t decide whether I’m enjoying or not. The overall theme seems to be a strong commentary on the dangers of blindly following ‘authority’, but it also has weird religious connotations that I can’t seem to get a grip on, because the moral seems to be ‘God sucks and is a ridiculously unfair douchebag’. Maybe that’s what they’re going for, I dunno. It just seems odd to me.

I continue to spent an inordinate amount of time on TikTok, although it has been lessening over the past few days. I’m tempted to say that the app is a terrible choice for my mental wellbeing, but I can’t honestly say that because it makes me smile and introduces me to people with similar issues to mine. So, screw it, I’m counting it as good for my mental health.


So what’s the final judgement on week 3? Well, writing and drawing were good, physical and health stuff was somewhat passable, self-promo was no better or worse than it ever is, and mental health was as good as can be expected under the circumstances. That all works out to a positive, right? Right. Go me!

Feel free to let me know how your year is going so far! Do you have any big goals? Specific plans? Anything awesome on the horizon? Share what’s going on with you! ❤